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Recognition

I used to think it did not matter if our hard work was recognized by our peers or not. I have since decided that it does make a difference. It does matter.

Over the last 15 years we have actively supported both financially and voluntarily, donated time and work for, served on, created and led committees, served as board officer and director roles, designed artwork for the magazine, set up health testing discounts at several specialties, actively promoted the club and breed by working breed booths, seeking new members – sponsoring and paying for new members and much much more.

Nealie and I are currently one of the (if not the only) only Stafford teams recognized by the AKC as a Breed Ambassador which means we have fulfilled and been signed off what it takes to be trusted to attend classrooms, libraries, scouting groups and any public place to speak about and promote the Staffordshire Bull Terrier. We visit classrooms where children can read to Nealie and listen to me discuss responsible pet ownership and more.

Nealie is also honored as a Register of Merit honoree by producing 4+ champions (and all done without handlers or taking them to shows week in and week out), although her name is not yet listed on the club website as such.

The Illustrated Breed Standard the club uses has almost identical text as the one Jason and I did for the rescue fundraising yet no mention of The Stafford Knot has been made. We agreed to allow the club to use our text in exchange for referencing and crediting the many people who contributed to the body off work which took years to produce. Sadly they did not. The parent club used the TSK seminar, both in full or parts of it, and we have always been happy to supply the club with the presentation when asked to do so. We also try to volunteer dogs for hands on assessments when possible including being at shows which we had not planned on attending just for this purpose.

For many many years I have spent countless hours and money of my own promoting the club. I have (for free) designed logos and artwork, made videos and fliers, uploaded to FB and IG for the club, designed trophies and shirts, and volunteered in person at most of the big specialties over the last 15 years. I have raised 1000’s of dollars for the club over the years beginning with selling 500 silicone anti BSL bracelets our first year of membership. We also ran several RDO days, rescue fun days and breed booths.

For years I did not say NO. I always said yes, of course I will help. This year I finally said no. I have done enough. It’s now time for others to do the work.

Recently, TSK was recognized by our Area Director only because she and I worked closely for a year to put on our most recent Specialty event. It was an overwhelming success in that people had a great time and it not only paid for itself but also raised in excess of $4000 for the club. A first. The club has always lost money. Always. Every. Single. National. I appreciated the AD recognizing my efforts and the contribution TSK has made. That gesture almost took away the hurt of the rejection of the others.

There were still complaints from the usual suspects. In fact, there were lots of complaints. All made by the same people who ALWAYS complain and rarely work. These same few people make it very difficult for those who do work hard. You know what they say about one bad apple – its very true. By the way – it’s not a bath mat you won at a DOG SHOW it’s a crate pad, DOH. And there WAS hospitality in the form of food in the free welcome bags, a free pizza party, a free spaghetti dinner, coffee pastries and sandwiches in the morning, coolers of drinks ringside and a cookout one evening. All free. No donation jar. A few ungrateful people leave a very bad taste especially when its constant.

Wouldn’t it be terrific if we could work together like I have been asking for the last 10-15 years? If we could endorse each other we would have more impact and more reach. TSK has ten years of articles available for free and if the club endorsed TSK all those articles would be known by all new members and new Stafford owners, not just followers of The Stafford Knot. TSK has a huge worldwide following. This could only help the parent club. If we could endorse one another and this would help everyone. One would think that would be a no brainer. No clue why the resistance.

I have worked with several former rescue chairs in some capacity – I have always been heavily involved. TSK (me) has been responsible for a great deal of rescue and rehoming work for the breed for many many years. We raise the money, we reach out and find homes, we pull dogs, we arrange transport and foster care – we have done everything we could. I would love to retire from this exhausting task! It would be wonderful if others would step up so I can retire.

The club talks big about promoting good sportsmanship. Let’s see some action behind those words. Endorse the hard work of all people working to Promote, Protect and Preserve. How about it?

So yes, it does matter if there is recognition.

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Never stop learning

On the recommended reading page here on our website we begin by stating “Never stop learning” and we follow our own advice! Recently, because of the friendship with one of our puppy buyers I had the opportunity to take a course in raw pet food nutrition. The course is an online one offered by Dana Scott of Dogs Naturally Magazine.

We have been feeding natural species appropriate diets to our pets for about fifteen years now and we have tried many combinations and formulas over the years. We update our nutrition page every now and again and we know people reference it. That page gets the second most number of hits on this website.

So back to this course – its been a while since I took a class with this much math and science! Remember in math class when you asked – will I ever use this knowledge in real life? Well, as it turns out – yes – yes I will use that math! Dana packs a ton of information into each module. She gives detailed information regarding her views on a correct primordial diet. She backs up her view with downloads of references along with course notes.

I learned a LOT taking this course. In fact, I also changed my viewpoint regarding a few things I thought I had correct. I now have a handy chart, links to online charts and I can calculate the exact percentages and food combinations to feed each pet – if I needed to. I mean, don’t get me wrong – the information is valuable in case I get into a debate with a non believer, in case I am asked advice by a newbie, if I run across a pet with particular dietary needs – yes, now not only can I know what to feed but I can also back it up with WHY.

Knowing me I won’t be quite specific or exact but I WILL and have changed the routine and combinations in my own pets meals. I also switch supplements from what I had been using to new products which are friendlier to not just my pets but also to the environment. Instead of talking forever here I wanted to say the NUTRITION page is now updated to reflect some of the knowledge I picked up in this course. Take a look and see what you think. Dana took great pains in backing up this information so I am willing to give it a try. Its not far from what we already were doing – just mainly tweaking the fats/ratios/sources and reintroducing Phytoplankton and green nutrition.

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Purebred Pride

We receive a LOT of interest in our Staffords. We might receive half dozen plus emails, PM’s, calls and yes even texts from strangers asking to purchase a puppy weekly. Here’s some advice. Don’t send a text asking for a puppy. Further, how about an introduction?

We ALWAYS ask everyone to please read this huge website prior to filling out the application to see if we are a good fit before wasting either of our time. There is a reason we have such a detailed website instead of how most breeders have – just pages showcasing their dogs accolades (or perhaps not) with an application, non refundable deposits and a wait list.

We do not pay our bills on the uterus’ of our Staffords.

We do not have a litter of puppies so that you can have one anytime you ask. There isn’t a kennel full of puppies out back for you to select any color you want. Far from that! Our dogs are our pets first. They live with us and enjoy being spoiled daily. We wouldn’t have it any other way.

We do not promote breeding for those who do not really truly understand this breed, are dedicated students of this breed, fully health test this breed, are active in breed clubs, help with rescue, live with your dogs inside your home, train using positive methods and extensively screen potential buyers including keeping in contact with them for the lifetime of the dogs you sell (to the best of your ability). We are not here to populate the world with Staffords. We have been actively involved in rescue for so long that we KNOW those who do not do the above will sell to people not prepared to be Stafford owners and we end up cleaning up after them.

We also do not sell to people looking to produce ‘sport mixes’. Why on earth would we dedicate 15 years to this breed and turn around and sell to someone we barely know who has zero knowledge of our breed approve of them breeding our fully health tested, carefully bred, Puppy Culture raised purebred Stafford with a fantastic pedigree to be used to make mutts? No way. So don’t even ask.

Too many ignorant people are breeding dogs without a care in the world what becomes of them down the road. We are not in that category. Not even close. So stop. Ask someone else if you can have their puppy. We want to sell to carefully screened, loving, dedicated people who become family. It doesn’t always work out this way but this is what we strive for. We may not be your breeder and that’s fine with us.

May the future of the Stafford be protected and may they enjoy the luxury of not becoming any more popular….for their sakes.

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Choking

If you regularly follow this blog and if you have read the website then you already know how important I feel it is to remain with your pets during feeding times. Watch them carefully not only to make sure they do not steal each others food, have a snarky moment with another or in the worst case – your dogs food becomes lodged in your dogs esophagus. If you are not present to monitor these situations you could end up with a very bad event, including loss of life.

Today while I was monitoring lunchtime one of our girls gulped her food and a large half frozen turkey gizzard became lodged in her airway. She was unable to force the food back up on her own. I quickly realized she was in distress and I intervened. I first attempted to reach inside her mouth and pull the food out myself but I was unable as her tongue had already begun to swell. I then performed Heimlich on her which efficiently produced the offending gizzard which I quickly grabbed to prevent her from grabbing it first.

As you might imagine my heart was racing and it would have been easy to panic but I remained calm so that she wouldn’t panic. I remembered my training and did what was needed to save her. Meanwhile it seemed like it took forever and my mind was playing all the horrible scenarios despite my feeling in control. I was lucky. She was lucky.

Afterwards I gave her a massage using YL DiGize on her belly and a blend of Lavender, Jade Lemon, Sage and Rosemary in a massage on her back and limbs. I diffused P&C (mostly for myself) and we all relaxed for about an hour while I watched her carefully for any issues or trouble she might experience. Thankfully she is totally ok.

I have decided to remove turkey gizzards (even when frozen) from their diets – we already no longer feed chicken necks and only duck heads when completely frozen.

If you do not know how to perform Heimlich on your pets PLEASE learn how! There are many videos available on You Tube that you should watch and learn.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

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The Dominance Controversy

https://canineprinciples.com/10-great-reasons-not-to-copy-cesar-millan/
I will forgive the writer for using the term ‘guardian’ and not owner only because she uses so many other wise words in this blog entry.

“The one thing all dog trainers will agree on is that the others are wrong”

I don’t know who said that first but in my experience its certainly true. No wonder most pet owners are confused. Before I knew any better I too was influenced by a local guy who a ton of dog owners referred to as our very own dog whisperer. I took a badly bred, very reactive dog to his class. I watched in horror as this man proceeded to place a prong collar on my dog and yank the crap out of him in order to get his attention. Wow. When that did not work he placed a shock collar on him, except he referred to it as a ‘stimulation training device’. I will never forgive myself for what I allowed this person to do to my dog and for me thinking this was acceptable. Times have changed.

His end goal was for the dogs to basically behave like doormats. He was a tape recorder telling us that we are the pack leader, we are in charge, we are in control….blah blah blah. Bullshit.

I bought/adopted/owned dogs all my life. I live with dogs for the interaction and pleasure of enjoying each others company. If I wanted a doormat I could buy one at Home Depot. I didn’t want to hurt my dogs. I didn’t want them to obey me because they feared me. I want them to make decisions to do things with me and enjoy these things. Granted, nail trims, baths, grooming are not always exciting activities but they also do not have to be torturous or scary!

Cesar Millan did a lot of things for dog owners. He did bring to attention the need to interact with the animals. At least people did see that they should spend time with their pets. BUT he also (having zero credentials) was offering some terrible advice on his reality show. He was cruel to the dogs. Watch a show of his with the sound off. Look at the dogs body language. Do you see fear? Do you see joy? The man is cruel. He is barbaric in so many ways. He teaches people that in order to live with a doormat . . . erm, a dog, that they must use force, intimidation and pain. Boy was he wrong.

I urge you to click the link below and read Dr Sophia Yin’s post on dominance. It’s lengthy but super valuable! After reading both articles posted here think about how you feel about what Mr. Millan tells people on his reality show and decide for yourself how you plan to engage your dogs. My hope is you choose a positive approach, offering choices to your dogs and engaging them in the learning process with you.

https://drsophiayin.com/philosophy/dominance/

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“Those who know do not speak. Those who speak do not know.”

There is much controversy as to who first spoke those words. There is little controversy over the truth those words speak.

Lately we have been discussing how interesting it is that for some people their default action/reaction is negative. It’s as if an immediate response must be made on each and every topic being discussed and they feel compelled to complain, bring in drama, point fingers, attack or bully. It almost seems out of the persons control, a conditioned response that may have taken a lifetime to develop and perfect.

In my transformation to try to become a more reasonable, peaceful, forgiving, tolerant and kind person I sometimes will play little games to amuse myself. One game is to keep mental notes of names of people who are either as described above or who is directly involved in the history of a dog we get into rescue or a re-home situation. This game is similar to the one you might play to make an important decision- making lists of pro and con – except in this instance the only conclusion which can be made is that the same names remain on each list. Those names become so familiar that when I log into FB to post my feed is littered with their drama and I see the pattern emerging daily.

These same people are great at grandstanding, playing the victim or creating drama. Always. The. Drama. If you didn’t know better you may think they work very hard and are wonderful giving responsible people. And in some parts of their lives they are just that. BUT when it really comes to selfless contribution you won’t want to count on these folks. Don’t put them on your team. Acknowledge that drama if you must, however walk, scroll, move away from it quickly. It’s contagious.

These folks will do their very best to sabotage those hard at work, no matter who they are, and instead somehow create a scenario where they are the heroes and save the day while holding the true workers under their hand, underwater, for as long as possible attempting to drown out reality. Don’t allow their actions to deter you from your goals. These people are little more than annoying flies, buzzing around, always. Flies never live long lives.

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Melissa Oil

25 USES & BENEFITS OF THE MELISSA ESSENTIAL OIL

I truly believe in the benefits of using essential oils in our everyday life. I have been a distributer with Young Living for over ten years (#1166695). I tried other brands but always came back to Young Living. Recently I saw a post where a couple of people were laughing at those of us who believe in and use EO’s and compared us to those who believe in Santa Claus. To those people I say – believe in whatever works for you but don’t make fun of those with differing beliefs from your own..

Melissa essential oil is one of the most costly oils available and for good reason. Commonly known as balm or lemon balm (as well as bee balm and sweet balm), melissa is a hardy herbaceous perennial native to southern Europe. It was introduced to northern Europe by the Romans. It has wrinkled and toothed, pale-green, nettle-like leaves, with tiny white flowers in June and July. The whole plant is fragrant, with a strong lemony smell. It makes a good garden plant, but it also grows wild in Europe, carpeting fields and woods, particularly around Angers in France. The name melissa derives from the Greek word for bee because the plant is irresistible to bees and has been grown for this purpose for centuries.

The plants are harvested in France in May or June just before the first flowers appear for the aroma is less interesting when the plant is in bloom. The oil is steam distilled from the melissa leaves and tops, and is pale yellow with an agreeable and subtle, warm, lemony aroma. Melissa oil is not common and it is very expensive because 7 tonnes are needed to produce 1 kg (21/4 lb) oil. It is very special.

The principal constituents: Citral, citronellol (responsible for the lemony smell), geraniol, limonene, linalool and pinene.

The expense of manufacturing melissa oil leads to falsification, usually with citrus oils or lemongrass (itself sometimes called melissa grass). As a result, you should buy melissa very carefully, as the remedy is more or less useless if the oil is not pure. Melissa is often confused with citronella. I recommend only buying from Young Living.

The oil is classified in France as a ‘stupifiant’ (narcotic), thus great care must be taken with its use. Research in the nineteenth century by Cadeac and Meunier revealed that the oil taken internally without food could provoke most unpleasant reactions – severe headache, sudden low blood pressure, and difficulty in breathing. Melissa oil must be administered extremely carefully, especially so with children, and I do not advise its use by non-practitioners. Personally, I use it as a diffused inhalant or very diluted in a roller. A little goes a very very long way!

Allergies
Add 1 drop of Melissa essential oil with 1 drop Lavender and 1 drop Peppermint to several ounces of water, swish around in the mouth and swallow (only if using a brand suitable for internal use). Or apply this formula to the bottom of your feet.

Anxiety
Melissa essential Oil is a mild sedative in small doses, and believed to calm anxiety.  Place a drop in your palm, rub between your hands, cup over your nose and mouth and breathe slowly for up to 30 seconds or more.

Bacterial Infections
If possible, apply 1 drop over the infected area or massage on the foot reflex points.

Bronchitis
Massage 1 drop onto the throat and chest up to 3x a day, or work into the reflex points of the feet.

Calming
Place a drop of Melissa in your palms, rub between your hands, cup over your nose and mouth and breathe slowly for up to 30 seconds or more.

Cold
Massage 1-2 drops onto the feet or over any symptomatic area.

Cold Sores
Such a great use for melissa essential oil! Dab a small amount directly on the area as soon as you feel a cold sore coming on, and repeat several times throughout the day.

Coughs
Massage 1 drop into the throat and chest up to 3x a day, or work into the reflex points of the feet.

Dementia
A recent study quoted in the Journal of Complimentary Medicine showed that Melissa Essential oil is a safe and effective treatment for the management of agitation in severe dementia. Place a drop of Melissa in your palms, rub between your hands, cup over your nose and mouth and breathe slowly for up to 30 seconds or more. Do this as often as needed for aggravation.

Depression
Place a drop of Melissa essential oil in your palms, rub between your hands, cup over your nose and mouth and breathe slowly for up to 30 seconds or more. Do this daily or as desired.

Eczema
Dilute 1 drop of Melissa essential oil with 3-4 drops of carrier oil and apply a small amount of the area 1-3 times a day.

Emotional Support
Massage 1 drop over the solar plexus and heart. It is a mild sedative in small doses, and believed to calm anxiety.

Energy
Inhale 1 drop from the palms of your hands for a pick-me-up, or diffuse throughout the room. Alternatively, you can mix 2 drops Melissa essential oil with 4 drops Wild Orange and 1 tablespoon carrier oil to gently rub onto the bottom of your feet or wherever it feels soothing.

Flu
Massage 1-2 drops into the reflex points of the feet or over any symptomatic area.

Hand-Foot-Mouth Disease
Dilute 1 drop of Melissa Oil with 3-4 drops of a carrier oil and massage a small amount over any symptomatic area, or the reflex points of the feet.

Headaches and Migranes
Add 2 drops Melissa to 1 teaspoon carrier oil and apply to forehead, temples, or neck.

Herpes
Only one drop is needed on lesions to promote remission… a doctor at the Technical University of Munich reported that application on Melissa Oil caused a complete remission of Herpes Simplex lesions. Place a small amount (up to 1 drop) directly on any outbreak 3x a day, and/or use for ongoing support.

Hopelessness
Massage 1 drop over the solar plexus, heart, or brow. Diffuse throughout the day.

Hypertension
Inhale from the bottle 3 or more times a day, or use melissa topically over any symptomatic area.

Indigestion
Mix together 4 drops Melissa, 4 drops Grapefruit, 2 drops Peppermint and 1 tablespoon carrier oil to massage onto abdomen, using clockwise strokes.

Overwhelm
Inhale directly from the bottle, or massage 1 drop over the solar plexus, heart, or brow.

PMS
Massage onto bottom of feet or onto abdomen. You can also mix together formula 4 drops Bergamot, 4 drops Fennel, 3 drops Melissa 1 tablespoon carrier oil and add to a warm/hot bath. Relax and enjoy until the water cools.

Skin Issues
Use a single drop of the Melissa essential oil over the issue (I would recommend diluting with a carrier oil) 1-3x a day.

Stomach Issues
Melissa soothes stomach, tones it up and strengthens it. It helps heal the wounds, scratches or ulcers in the stomach, maintains proper flow of gastric juices and bile into the stomach and also protects it from infections. Use a drop over the abdomen (I would recommend diluting with a carrier oil) and massage using clockwise strokes 1-3x a day.

Stress
Place a drop of melissa oil in your palm, rub between your hands, cup over your nose and mouth, and breathe slowly for up to 30 seconds or more. Do this daily or as desired.

Vertigo
Inhale directly from the bottle as needed, or apply a small amount over the forehead.

Viral Infections
Apply one drop of melissa essential oil over the infected area or massage onto the feet 3x a day.

Warts
Place 1 drop (or less by dabbing a q-tip on the top of your dropper bottle) directly on the wart 1-2x a day until it falls off.

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Addition by subtraction

I’ve blogged before about how its super important to support one another, work together or if you can’t just remain silent. We all have at least one important interest in common. Staffordshire Bull Terriers. If we didn’t share this interest you wouldn’t be here.

We don’t have to be best friends with all Stafford owners. We don’t have to invite them all into our homes or even into our lives. We don’t even really have to like them or agree with their choices. But we can work together. We can have one another backs instead of stabbing them. We can support and preserve Staffords by letting go of petty unimportant feelings and setting all of the negative opinions aside and come together for the dogs. We can’t change others behaviors anyway. Its difficult enough to change our own!

In the past I have been guilty of saying things I am ashamed of. I have attempted to right these wrongs and try to be a better person. I recognize my weakness as lacking the confidence to be myself and now I am stronger. I was a weak follower. I did and said what was currently expected or popular and I never felt right about that. During my transition to becoming a stronger person if I saw a group acting disrespectfully I would try to defend or stand up for the person being bullied or wrongly accused. In those attempt it usually made things worse, not better. This may sound selfish but now I worry less about others and more about myself and the breed. I avoid bullies and crowds of lemmings and now stand on my own. I am honest with my words and actions. Its not a popular place to be but its right for me.

You are probably saying what does this blog entry have to do with Staffords? In the world of dogs I’ve been told I need thicker skin, get over it, just go with the flow…all words meant to ‘help’ me. The world of dogs is ugly. People act and speak standing precariously balancing between ego, self importance  lacking confidence and masking that with bully behavior. I’m at the point now that what others say about me just doesn’t matter. I know ugly things are said about me – untruths, half truths, I am given petty labels, gossip is spread –  just plain meanness. I know a person who told a potential puppy buyer that I was ‘intense’ as that would be an insult. Its not. I am. Another breeder told a potential buyer upon hearing she was on my wait list ‘good luck with that’. I don’t even know what she meant by that.  Recently two of my buyers were accused of cheating by their competition – they had not cheated – so I stood up and defended them. I was laughed at. I have had accusations that I was pocketing money from my rescue efforts – how laughable is that? I don’t need the money and anyone can look up the public records since its a registered non profit. We simply don’t bring in a ton of money and we keep excellent accounting records – people who accuse others of doing wrong actions generally are not above doing those things themselves. The dog world is an ugly place.

In another situation, last March we showed Marina at Crufts in Birmingham, England. This was a highlight in our lives as breeders – Marina qualified four times and deserved to be seen on that green carpet. You would think my ‘friends’ and fellow Stafford owners would be excited for us and say nice supportive words  – and most did/were – yet one person whom I have known a very long time not only had nothing nice to say but instead made ugly comments about my shoes. ?

What other people say about you says more about them actually.

If you are excited about an achievement or a new puppy or title or anything you want to share the happiness about – share that with the world. Then sit back and watch how others respond to your happiness. Are people excited for you? Do they seem genuine when they congratulate you? Or do they instead say ‘when my dog did that …..”. People who are not your VIPs will always turn your success around to relate a story about themselves. They usually will also not have the time to type out words of true encouragement or say meaningful comments – usually its a ‘thumbs up’ emoji or a shortened ‘congrats’ or something about themselves – because they feel they need to remind the world that they are important, they are the focus of every conversation, their achievements mustn’t be forgotten. They may make ugly comments about your dog or your efforts or accuse you of cheating. These are not your VIPs.

In my growth and struggles with being a better person I have learned to let people go. I don’t say unkind things about them personally, and I wouldn’t say unkind things about their dogs (although in my past confidence  lacking behaviors those were my go to actions embarrassingly enough)  but I simply move on. As far as I’m concerned, the fastest way to live our best lives and have more of what we want is to remove more of what we don’t want. This is addition by subtraction, and if you choose to give yourself this gift, it has the power to positively change your life. Can you afford to put off giving yourself that gift any longer? Your best life may depend on your answer. People who choose to hurt others are the broken souls of the world who are deeply hurting themselves whether or not they recognize this. Their hate has nothing to do with how they feel about you, it’s a reflection about how they feel about themselves.

If we are to remain ‘in dogs’ then some changes had to be made. From now on, the front row is for real fans only, and the VIP section is only for the special people who have earned the right to be there. Let’s face it, not everyone in our lives can be “very important.” If everyone in our lives is “very important,” that’s the same thing as saying that no one is. Only the real fans deserve the privilege of being the “Very Important People” in our lives. Who are these very important people?

• They are the first ones to help us up when we fall down.

• They encourage our hopes and dreams instead of stomping on them.

• They stick around when everyone else is bailing out on us.

• They build us up instead of tear us down.

• They treat us with dignity and respect at all times.

• They offer a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on when we need it.

• They love us unconditionally.

The bar is set pretty damn high for VIPs– that’s why these people are “very important.” Try to surround yourself with your VIP’s. Gravitate towards those who help you feel the sunshine, not those who live in a constant storm.